Just in from the Grass is Always Greener Department

By Jean Cherni, H. Pearce Company's Senior Living Services Program

Having made 13 moves (so far) in my lifetime, I especially enjoyed the following article on where to retire that reached my desk recently. Perhaps it is because I have lived in other areas that I am especially appreciative of how much Connecticut has to offer. Although our state can be on the expensive side, it has a lifestyle matched by few other places.

For example:

- You can live in Arizona where …

1. You are willing to park three blocks away because you found shade.
   
   
2. You can drive for 4 hours in one direction and never leave town.
   
   
3. You have more than 100 recipes for Mexican food.
   
   
4. You know that "dry heat" is comparable to what hits you in the face when you open your oven door.
   
   
5. The four seasons are tolerable, hot, really hot and ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

- You can live in California where …

1. You make more than $250,000 and you still can’t afford to buy a house.
   
   
2. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.
   
   
3. You know how to eat an artichoke.
   
   
4. When asked how far something is, you say how long it will take to get there.
   
   
5. The four seasons are: Fire, Santa Ana, Mud and Drought.

- You can live in New York City where …

1. You say "the city" and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan.
   
   
2. You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but can’t find Wisconsin on a map.
   
   
3. You think Central Park is "nature."
   
   
4. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multilingual.
   
   
5. You think eye contact is an act of aggression.

- You can live in Maine where …

1. You only have four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup and Tabasco.
   
   
2. Halloween costumes fit over parkas.
   
   
3. You have more than one recipe for moose.
   
   
4. Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less than eight buttons.
   
   
5. The four seasons are: winter, still winter, almost winter and construction.

- You can live in the Deep South where …

1. You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store.
   
   
2. Y’all" is singular and "all y’all" is plural.
   
   
3. "He needed killin’" is a valid defense.
   
   
4. Everyone has two first names: Billy Bob, Jimmy Bob, Ma Sue, Betty Jean, etc.

- You can live in Colorado where …

1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car.
   
   
2. A pass does not involve a football or dating.
   
   
3. The top of your head is bald, but you still sport a ponytail.
   
   
4. You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home and he stops at the day care center.

- You can live in the Midwest where …

1. Your idea of a traffic jam is 10 cars waiting to pass a tractor.
   
   
2. You have had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" on the same day.
   
   
3. You end sentences with a preposition: "Where’s my coat at?"
   
   
4. When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, "Sure was different."

- And, you can live in Florida where …

1. You eat dinner at 4 in the afternoon.
   
   
2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind — even houses and cars.
   
   
3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.
   
   
4. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people.
   
   
5. "Gators" often join your backyard picnic.

Think I’ll stay put, right here in Connecticut. How about you?

Jean Cherni is founder of Senior Living Solutions, a retirement advisory service.  Contact her at jeancherni@sbcglobal.net or 15 The Ponds, Branford 06405.

H. Pearce Company REALTORS® is a full-service real estate company with more than 100 agents and branch offices in greater New Haven and the Shoreline. Corporate and & Commercial offices are located in North Haven, where the company was founded in 1958. All listings can be found in color on the web at: www.hpearce.com.