"Senior Moments" Articles
*as featured in The New Haven Register, Living Section

Happy Valentine's Day, Thomas Oland, wherever you are

By Jean Cherni, H. Pearce Company's Senior Living Services Program

Articles

2008

Valentine’s Day is a day for lovers, the world over. Possibly of pagan origin, but perhaps some Christians who enjoyed the fun but disapproved of some of the sexual practices, foisted the holiday on Saint Valentine, who having been beheaded by Emperor Claudius, was in no condition to object.

While this is now celebrated as a day to cherish those nearest and dearest to us as well as a day in which we might reveal a secret passion, I can’t help reminiscing just a little, about some dimly remembered but never completely forgotten, past loves. My first real crush when I was about eight years old was a young boy named Thomas Oland who had the most beautiful blonde, wavy hair. Although he was only a year older than me and wore glasses, I thought he looked like Nelson Eddy. Unlike Eddy’s famous partner, Jeanette MacDonald, I not only couldn’t sing, I could barely speak in his presence. We were in a local theatrical production together and I wore a green taffeta dress and even stopped biting my nails in an effort to look grown-up. Several years later, I was on a New York subway with my mother shortly after recovering from a bad case of measles which left me looking bloated and splotchy. Suddenly, there was Thomas coming toward us. All of the old feelings rushed back and I wanted to throw myself under the wheels of the train rather than have him see me as I looked that day. I recall being unbelievably rude,answering his “hello” over my shoulder as I pretended sudden interest in an overhead advertisement.

In high school, I developed a terrible crush on a tall, quiet, olive skinned boy who was a senior when I was a mere sophomore. Bob Gans sat directly in front of me in typing class and I fell in love with the way his dark hair came to a point at the back of his slender neck. Unfortunately, he only had eyes for tall, popular Betty Miller. Bob had wanted to become a doctor. I wonder if he did. When I finally became a senior, the apple of my eye was my “steady”, Don. We saw or telephoned one another constantly and were considered “a pair”. Before I left for college in a far away state, he wanted to become engaged but I was aghast at the very idea of getting married so young. Guess he was really into the marriage idea as he eventually owned a most successful bridal shop in upstate New York. While at the University of Iowa, I dated (again a blonde) Warren Johnson who was a law student. He was the dishwasher in the restaurant where I waited tables in return for my meals. I probably owe a few high marks I received to the fact that the only time we had to see one another was when we studied together in the law library.

Eventually, I returned to New York and dated several young men but no one seriously. One evening as I was painting the kitchen in the apartment I shared with two other working gals, Bunny, one of my room-mates, came home with Val who was tall and attractive but even then, had very little hair. He called a few nights later to ask me out and Bunny indicated they were just friends and I should certainly not hesitate to go. However, she did add, “You’ll find Val is a lot of fun but he won’t take you anywhere expensive”…. a comment I still tease him about. Two years later, Bunny was the maid-of-honor at our wedding. In the final analysis, we don’t marry someone we can live with, we marry the person we cannot live without. Happy Valentine’s Day to present and past loves.

Jean Cherni is founder of Senior Living Solutions, a retirement advisory service.  Contact her at jeancherni@sbcglobal.net or 15 The Ponds, Branford 06405.

H. Pearce Company REALTORS® is a full-service real estate company with more than 100 agents and branch offices in greater New Haven and the Shoreline. Corporate and & Commercial offices are located in North Haven, where the company was founded in 1958. All listings can be found in color on the web at: www.hpearce.com.




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